A calming Bale Mountains picture.

A lot of the time here I feel like I'm becoming more Ethiopian (more laid back, unadrenalised, no-stress, always time for people, etc) and then something happens that re-awakens the old responses. The latest response by our programme manager to the delay to our transfer to Gondar has really tested our patience. Her response defies logic and shows an incomprehensible unwillingness to think outside a now-outdated plan. I spent a chunk of this morning trying to compose an email to her explaining the exact details of our current work status, and expressing concern at how she seems to be working against us instead of in partnership with us. All this hassle had a knock-on effect on my mood. The familar responses to stress surfaced surprisingly quickly, and for the first time in ages I started getting impatient with people coming to see me with HDP issues. Normally I'd enjoy trying to engage with a colleague in Amharic but today I couldn't be bothered and just wanted to "get on". It's so easy to slip back into long established ways of being! As the day progressed I felt grumpy, irritable and impatient. Trivial incidents such as a colleague not understanding a simple request first time produced adrenalin-fuelled short-tempered responses. On the way home the dozens of kids shouting for my attention made me feel angry and provoked, instead of amused. I feel calmer now and aware that it's useless pretending that these feelings don't exist and "shouldn't happen". Being here "on show" is tough, not least because showing anger, impatience or irritation is extremely un-Ethiopian, as if expressing these emotions is made taboo from birth. One of the other volunteers today described Ethiopians as very passive-aggressive. They might never get angry and everything is "no problem" at all times, but their punctuality is shocking as is their unspoken refusal to complete any task by the agreed deadline. My colleagues all acknowledge the importance of punctuality but they are still late, and rarely apologise for it! There are times when I want to moan at people to leave me alone and get on with some work, instead of endlessly interrupting each other and never complaining. Surely even Ethiopians feel angry and irritated sometimes but they never ever show it!